Cara Lai
Audio Dharma
The in-between
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The in-between

Being nowhere is awesome.

Do you find yourself in limbo a lot? Are you hovering between one thing and the next? Maybe you never really chose a distinct career, or landed firmly in a relationship, or maybe you move around a lot. Do you have a love-hate relationship with meditation? Do you find yourself in the middle of other people’s disagreements? Do you dabble in things but don’t follow through? You might have issues, but you might also just be a bridge.

What’s a bridge? It’s the word I’m using to describe someone who is meant to dwell in the spaces of uncertainty, creating connection between the ultimate reality of wisdom and compassion; and the relative reality of day-to-day life. It could be someone who creates a pathway between enlightenment and samsara, or between the mind and the body, or between groups of people. A bodhisattva1 is a kind of bridge.

Bridges are necessary to bring things into balance. Without them, the head and the heart are disconnected; masculine and feminine energies fight with each other instead of working together; we’re either ruled by our emotions or totally disconnected from feeling anything. Without bridges, we’re stuck in the world of suffering with no way out.

feel.

Babies are bridges between the human realm and whatever wild unborn realm they recently emerged from, so they’re constantly falling asleep to revisit that unborn realm of the unmanifested, then bringing in some of that pure love energy to the human world where it’s much needed.

Dan Harris, who might hate being associated with the woo-woo of that last paragraph (sorry, Dan), is a bridge. He’s bridging the gap between skepticism and mysticism, between the mind and the body; making it possible for people who believe mostly in logic to free their minds. Dan, you’re dong a great job (IMHO).

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Some people who read this newsletter might be a bridge between the Buddhist monastic world, and the lay world. You might sit meditation retreats but not ever want to shave your head and give up all your possessions. The lay world needs you to bring all that good wisdom and compassion you unlock when you go on retreat, back home with you. And the monastic world needs it’s cloistered bubble to be popped every now and then, to bring it back in touch with the real world.

If you’ve ever found yourself uncomfortable or insecure about the fact that you haven’t committed to something in your life, or because you’re always in some kind of middling role, maybe you don’t have to feel weird about it anymore. Maybe you’re meant to be there, in that awkward in-between space, so that you can translate or transmit some message from one place to another, so that you can be a vessel of connection that brings things back into balance. Maybe when you just commit to being nowhere, it’s not awkward anymore: it’s awesome.

1

In Mahayana Buddhism, a bodhisattva is someone who vows to attain full Buddhahood but postpones final nibbana in order to help all beings achieve liberation.


Upcoming Event: Authentic Activism

Speaking of owning your role in the world, I’m offering this online mini-retreat on January 25th to help people orient towards their own unique way of showing up for a world in need. There will be dharma talks, guided meditations, q&a, and snacks (bring your own snacks).

Register Here

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